Syracuse Basketball: Hey Marek Dolezaj, here’s a “perfect” non-pizza diet

Syracuse basketball, Marek Dolezaj (Mandatory Credit: Gregory Fisher-USA TODAY Sports)
Syracuse basketball, Marek Dolezaj (Mandatory Credit: Gregory Fisher-USA TODAY Sports)

Syracuse basketball senior Marek Dolezaj may have to skip pizza for a little while, and that could pose a challenge.

It’s widely documented that Syracuse basketball senior power forward/center Marek Dolezaj enjoys pizza. I can relate. My family has a lot of roots in New York, so a tasty slice is in my DNA.

Dolezaj, who is my hero for his toughness, busted a tooth toward the end of the Orange’s victory over former Big East Conference rival Georgetown this past Saturday night from the Carrier Dome.

The ‘Cuse is slated to travel to North Carolina on Tuesday evening, which will prove a tall task for the Orange, because the Tar Heels are annually one of the best rebounding squads across the country.

In any event, Syracuse basketball junior shooting guard Buddy Boeheim, while giving an interview with the Packer and Durham Show on the ACC Network, playfully noted that the 6-foot-10 Dolezaj “isn’t supposed to eat pizza for the next two weeks following the necessary dental repairs,” per a report from Chris Carlson of Syracuse.com.

Oh, no. That could be a problem. Not to worry, Marek, our research department here at Inside The Loud House has poured through tons of articles on the Internet to provide you with the most delicious, non-pizza diet available on this planet.

First and foremost, our research tells us that citrus foods and juices aren’t so good. So while orange slices and orange juice would, under normal circumstances, be our top recommendation, we’d advise you to hold off on anything orange-related for the time being.

However, other juices, smoothies, milkshakes and soups are wonderful options. Unfortunately, though, our research determines that tomato juice is also not a great thing to drink at this juncture.

Other items to consider include bananas, applesauce, watermelon, yogurt, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, noodles (but no tomato sauce!), pudding, scrambled eggs, oatmeal, soft cheeses, meatloaf and pureed veggies like peas and carrots.

We understand that a love for pizza makes it hard to go without pizza for an extended period of time. The author of this column would have similar issues.

So, if you need a pizza fix, we might suggest pizza-related appetizers and snacks, such as pizza bites, pizza bagels, pizza rolls, pizza poppers, pizza quesadillas, pizza waffles (yes, this is apparently a thing), a pizza omelet, cheese toast, pizza crackers, a pita pizza, pizza dip with soft tortillas, or bite-sized pizza grilled cheese.

Dipping some pizza crackers in soup sounds pretty delish to me. Okay, and if you really crave a traditional New York slice, maybe hold off on eating the crust, since it can get a little chewy?

Just a thought. We know it won’t be easy. Best of luck over the next few weeks, Marek. We’re rooting for you.